Divorce is surrounded by myths and misconceptions that can make an already stressful process even more confusing. In this article, we debunk the top 10 most common divorce myths, helping you separate fact from fiction and navigate the process with clarity.
1. Your spouse must have done something wrong for you to divorce them
Prior to April 2022, you had to show your right to a divorce by providing a reason for the breakdown of your relationship. This is no longer the case, and the law accepts that a marriage can fail without one of the parties being to blame. Spouses can grow apart and realise that their marriage no longer serves a purpose. This is known as a “No-Fault Divorce” and eliminates the need to blame your spouse for the separation. You only need to confirm that the marriage has irretrievably broken down, which simplifies the process.
2. There’s no such thing as a quick divorce
Individuals going through a divorce are often eager to know how long the process will take. Unfortunately, there is no straightforward answer, and it varies based on your situation and how complicated it is. A divorce will take at least six months, but typically a year or more to complete. When no-fault divorces were implemented in April 2022, a “cooling-off” period was also introduced. This means that once a divorce application is issued, there is a 20-week cooling off period during which the parties can reflect and ensure there is no possibility of reconciliation before proceeding with the divorce.
3. Divorce can never be amicable
There is often a misconception that divorces are incapable of being amicable. The implementation of no-fault divorce has resulted in more amicable divorces by eliminating the option to blame your spouse for the divorce. Married couples may also apply for a divorce together rather than individually. If the choice to divorce is mutual, the parties may decide that filing together provides comfort and control over the process. It can be tough to agree on the financial aspects of your divorce with your spouse. However, with the help of a solicitor and legal guidance, it is not uncommon to achieve an outcome that is mutually beneficial without lengthy arguments.
4. You have to have a solicitor to get divorced
Although it is not a legal requirement to have a solicitor acting for you in your divorce, it is highly advised. Without the involvement of a legal professional, it is likely the process will feel complicated and overwhelming. It is critical to seek legal advice on the fairness of a financial agreement to avoid an unfair outcome. The financial agreement must be documented in a Financial Remedy Order and approved by the Court. If the order is not properly drafted, it will not be approved, delaying the process. As a result, it is wise to instruct a solicitor as soon as you decide to initiate divorce proceedings.
5. Divorces are expensive
People automatically assume that divorces are always expensive which can deter them from applying for one. The cost of a divorce entirely depends on the complexities of each case and the assets involved. We frequently work with people who have already discussed and agreed on the distribution of assets in their divorce and simply need us to advise on the fairness of the agreement and draft it into the Financial Remedy Order. As a result, the suggestion that divorces are always expensive is false, and the cost varies greatly.
6. Assets are always split equally in a divorce
The starting point is for assets to be divided equally, aiming for a 50:50 division of the marital pot. Principles of fairness can override the presumption and could result in an unequal division of assets. If equal division is unsuitable, the court will consider many factors. These are included in Section 25 of The Matrimonial Causes Act 1973. Some considerations are the ages of the parties, the duration of the marriage and the earning capacity and financial needs of each party.
7. After divorce my spouse has no claim to my finances
As divorce is now granted on a no-fault basis and the online divorce portal is relatively simple to use, it is easier to get a divorce. The downside of this is that some people apply for divorces without getting legal advice and are unaware of the problems that may occur if they receive a Final Order to officially end their marriage without dealing with the finances in a Financial Remedy Order that is legally binding. Although a Final Order terminates the marriage, it does not stop your ex-spouse from pursuing a financial claim following your divorce. Until you both remarry or pass away, you are financially tied to one another. It is therefore always advised to handle the finances before obtaining the Final Order.
8. Divorce always ends up in court
Divorces do not always involve court proceedings. Divorces are only heard in court in some cases; most of the time, they can be settled outside of court. Before applying to court for a financial settlement, the parties must first engage in mediation to attempt to reach an agreement. Typically, parties can achieve an agreement through mediation or negotiations with their solicitors instead of going to court. This is always recommended whenever possible to reduce legal fees.
9. I’ll receive more money from the divorce if my spouse acted badly
As stated above, divorces are based on a no-fault basis which leaves individuals confused about the relevance of “bad behaviour”. There is potential for conduct to be considered by the court in extreme circumstances. Personal misconduct is unlikely to have an impact on the financial settlement. For example, if one party commits adultery, the other party will not receive a better financial outcome. Financial and litigation misconduct may have an impact on the settlement if, for example, one party has dissipated assets which reduces the value of the “matrimonial pot”.
10. Children always reside with their mother after a divorce
When parents divorce, mothers are not automatically granted custody of their children. In most circumstances, parents can establish an agreement for their children’s post-separation arrangements either directly, through solicitor negotiations, or through mediation. In some cases, it is necessary to apply to the court for a Child Arrangements Order to determine who the child should reside with and how much time they should spend with the other parent. The courts do not favour mothers over fathers; the main consideration is the child’s welfare and what is best for them. The court will always encourage a relationship with both parents when possible. The courts can make a Live with Order in respect of either the mother or father to the proceedings, it depends on the circumstances of the case and what is best for the child.
As you can see, divorce isn’t always a straightforward process and there are lots of things to consider when you separate from your spouse. For expert help and guidance to navigate your divorce, or to find out how to start the divorce process, contact our friendly Family Law Team who will be happy to help. Call 0113 322 9222 or email enquiries@consilialegal.co.uk